Why Family?

Several years ago, when I was at a small group meeting, one of the girls in our group was discussing some recent growth she had experienced in the midst of difficult family circumstances.

“I think God blesses us with families so that we learn to be humble and to grow in Him,” she said.

Another girl in the group responded with wry humor, “Or families are a curse from the Fall!”

We’ve all experienced rough times with family members. Even those who come from supportive Christian families still have to deal with conflicts, as multiple people with their own ideas and wills have to co-exist daily. While I don’t think families themselves are a part of the Fall (after all, Adam and Eve were put into a family together before the Fall), I do believe that the tensions and frustrations many people associate with “family” are a result of sin and the Fall. Since we are all sinners, we all hurt each other – sometimes intentionally, sometimes unintentionally.

Where friends, co-workers, teachers, and strangers are concerned, we can ignore people we don’t like. We can create distance and remove regular opportunities for conflict. With family members, especially those who live in the same house, distance and escape aren’t as practical. Living in families requires us to face our sinful natures – to struggle with our own sin and to struggle with others’ sins toward us.

And yet, in this broken mess that is often “family,” God is working. He is growing us, shaping us to be more like Jesus. The key is that we have to let Him do it. We can’t resent our family situations so much that we stop listening for His voice. We have to expect God to meet us right where we are and to work on our behalf, even when He doesn’t do it in the time or the manner that we think He should.

Have you ever felt like you were “cursed” with a family, rather than “blessed”? How is God working in and through your family life? Even if you can’t see or think of anything right away, spend at least ten minutes today thinking and praying about the good works that God is doing. Pray until God brings something to mind. Then thank Him for His provision and His strength. Ask Him to sharpen your faith through your family.